To be honest I've never really thought about my age or obsessed with it. I admit turning 40 was weird. More because I was no where even close to where I thought I would be at this stage in my life. Also, living in California I became hyper aware of my bodies short comings.
Perhaps because I perceivabley look young. I say perceivabley because people have always assumed I'm younger. I have no idea if that's because I project immaturity...its possible.
Lately though its how age comes up in conversation. For example when reflecting on my move, marriage or life in general people will say things like "Well your so young...don't worry about it..." or "Well that's a great place for you to live...a lot of people in their early 30's love living there..." and I could go on. I was reacting by saying "I'm 41..." to which people gasp. Not a mild gasp either - the kind of gasp that causes their body to spasm and then I get this grave look as if I just announced I had a tumor like growth or found a lump. Then they kinda shrug their shoulders and deflect in a way that only enforces the sense I am in the final days of my life. Downward spiral. It's over. Now I just let them carry on with the age innuendos...while I chew on the truth of my age in silence. I let them believe I'm 25 when I'm really staring down the barrel of reality of 40 something. Which is not as sexy as they sell it on TV.
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